Allyballybum / Jan 23 2010 13.36

And yes I know I spelt Suicide wrong

danielle / Jan 23 2010 13.40

Hey

Ive been suicidal and i self harm, So i hope i can help you understand why people do it.

Yeah in a way i guess suicide is selfish and the easy way out but when you feel that low it seems like the only option, You dont think about others. Sometimes people are so scared to ask for help... Sometimes its because they have illness which impair how they think or they make irrational desions.

Self harm well i know i do it because it makes me feel more incontrol it makes my emotional pain into physical pain something i can see which for me makes it easier to cope with. Well self harm is addictive, it reallys happy hormones (endorphines) so at the time you get a high but after it you get a low so you di it again to get the high. Thats why most people who self harm will try to cover up there scars cause they amy be embarresed about it and scared aboy how people will react - I feel that its not socially acceptable to do it, Thats why i cover up my scars.

ox

han-han / Jan 24 2010 11.18

heyy,

your arent the only one,, yeah i always think id be better of dead but then i think of my sister who is disabled n it makes me feel selfish cos when my dad gets older n weaker then who will look after her when he is gone. So that is the only thing that stops me from doing it

xx

jess12 / Jan 24 2010 13.49

i tink ur the selfish one allyballybum not to be nasty but sometimes people need to have support and they cant speek to anyone so its comfoting to hurt ur self to feel better sometimes people dont understand things so they think its wroung

Ratty96 / Jan 24 2010 14.44

Danielle, thank you for writing that - I never understood self harm, but now it actually makes sense. I feel bad because in the past I have called self-harmers stupid. Now I understand and I wish I'd never said that :( I hope things get better for you soon. It must be horrible feeling that bad.

Jenny94 / Jan 24 2010 15.21

I totally agree with jess12,

allyballbum -  you may think its stupid but some people really do feel its their only option. I am happy for u that you've never felt that way and i think you should be more thankful.

Imagine feeling worthless and not wanting to carry on, with people not UNDERSTANDING what you're going through and JUDGING you instead of repecting and trying to help.

I agree with Jess that its you who is the selfish one because its easier to just disregard suicide and say its silly than to think and say hang on its horrrible that people should feel that bad about themselves.

I hope this has made you understand

Jenny94 / Jan 24 2010 15.27

Hey thanks for being honest,

i've been self harming for a year and a half and i know how judgmental people can be when they don't understand something. I do to feel something and to make the pain inside easier to deal with. Not everyone who self harms is suicidal, however some, like me, have or were. It horrible even though it makes you feel better because i always feel guilty and paranoid the next day. 

I'm really happy that you now do understand and could i ask you to stop people from making stupid comments about it because you never know who self harms and sometimes things that are said can be incredibly hurtful without intention.

take care

Jenny xxxxxxx

Jenny94 / Jan 24 2010 15.32

I know you don't mean to offend, but you have because i have to think about self harm everyday, whether that be to physically stop myself from doing it or trying to cover up scars and its horrible.

so for you to turn round and say "i don't get it" makes me rather annoyed. it helps because it makes the pain physical and therefore easier to deal with. Sometimes i do it to feel SOMETHING because i block out so many feelings that i can feel numb and empty inside.

I hope you now understand.

unhappy1993 / Jan 24 2010 18.12

I do Agree with jenny94 . The person above you may not know what we are going through because unless you have been depressed then you dont know how we feel!

Not be horibble or anything to Allyballybum but it was a bit harsh what you wrote i know u saii no affence to people but this can cause a problem to people to tell u the truth ! 

anyway take care

xxx

Hope19 / Jan 24 2010 18.55

Hi,

I can see where your coming from with the suicide comments, however, If things ever get that bad that you don't feel that you can do anything else, you may not see that side of it. They may just see it as an escape, as a way out. We have to be there for them, and show them that life is worth living .

And as for self harm. It is a way of coping - by no means a good way of coping. But a way of coping with the challenges, and the problems that life gives us. Some people feel that it is the best way for them, and that there are no alternatives. But you have to show them that there are other ways of dealing with their problems, and be supportive. Not alienate them, and make them feel even more alone, and lost than they already do.

You have to be there for people, and support them when they need it most. Not increase the stigma that surrounds these issues. Because it's the stigma that surrounds this subject that can stop people talking about it, and Not talking is the worst thing that you can do.

You have to talk to someone. Talking helps. It's really hard, but we all have to try and understand that people all have their reasons for doing what they do, and we have to try not to judge people for their actions, and just be there for them when they need it most.

 I have been suicidal, and I self harm. So I hope that this message has helped you to understand a little more about it.

Thanks

xxx