I am now 19.
For the last 3 years I have been having a relationship with a next door neighbour 34 years oler than me.
Before I was 16 he used to say suggestive things to me and say he could see me in the garden in y bikini and wondered what I looked like naked. He made good friends with my family and used to take me out a lot. I used to flirt and he would too.
His touching began just as I turned 16. He tried to get me to touch him and when I refused he said don't tell anyone and I didn't. 3 days after I turned 16 he took me to a carpark and gave me champagne and I lost my virginity. I seemed to be under his spell and over the coming weeks he took me to all sorts of places to have his way. He told me we didn't need protection because he had had an operation.
I have been under his spell since then. He says he loves me.
I have never told anyone but I feel dirty and used. Was I abused?
