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Hi there,
Sometimes counselling can be seen as something that will fix everything, when in reality it doesn’t usually work like that. Counselling can help, and it can be one part of your journey towards change, but it has to come at the right time. Just because it didn’t change everything all at once, it doesn’t mean it can’t help you move towards changing things.
Counsellors and therapists want to help people, but they’re only part of the solution. A lot of the time you need to be ready and in a place where their support is going to be useful and that’s not something you have much control over. If it’s not the right time for you, then that’s okay – this isn’t your fault. Although it may not be the right time for you, it can still help you take some steps towards change.
Change can often come in small steps – so small that maybe one step to another isn’t really noticeable, but when you look back at how far you’ve come then you can see a big difference.
It might help to think about what feels right for you and what kind of support you'd like to have. Feeling confident about yourself can affect your choices too, so perhaps try our tips for building confidence and self-esteem.
It can also help if the people around you know as much as possible. The more your family and counsellors know, the more that they can help.
Talking about difficult feelings is hard. It might help to think about what’s really stopping you from being open with your family – understanding this first can help you to know what to do next. Sometimes drinking and taking drugs can feel like a good way to distract yourself from how you feel, but you might find that it makes you feel worse afterwards.
If you want help with talking to your family or your counsellor you can alwaystalk to our counsellors. They're here to listen, and can support you cope with self-harming, suicidal feelings, eating problems or anything else you'd like to talk about.
I hope this helps to make things clearer for you.
Take care,
Sam
Contact a counsellor online or call 0800 1111. Calls are free and confidential.