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Hi there,
When people we care about are going through tough times it can be difficult to know what to say or do to help them feel better. Showing you care by listening and offering support can make a big difference to that person, even if it doesn’t feel that way at the time.
Discovering that she can’t have a baby has had a big effect on your twin sister. Until she adjusts to the idea she may feel resentful, upset and angry. Your sister might say or do things that upset you while she’s feeling this way. If this happens, let her know how that makes you feel. You could encourage her to talk about how she’s feeling and spend time with her doing things that you both enjoy.
I can hear that you’re feeling a little guilty about having a boyfriend and that you haven’t suffered the same problem as your twin, but this is nobody’s fault and it’s not something you need to feel bad about. It’s okay to live your life as you want to do and to enjoy it.
Talking to a trusted adult such as a family member, teacher or counsellor could also help your sister. She can also visit her doctor to discuss infertility and how it affects her, both now and in the future.
Supporting somebody you care about can be tough and it’s important to remember to look after yourself, too. ChildLine is here for you – and your sister – whenever you need to talk.
Take care,
Sam
Contact a counsellor online or call 0800 1111. Calls are free and confidential.