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Hi,
Thanks for your letter.
It sounds like you are finding life at home really difficult to cope with and I’m glad you felt able to write me a letter.
You have told me that your mum takes all her anger out on you which is not ok. I can hear that she doesn’t treat your siblings this way and it could be really hard for you to feel singled out. From what you have said, this happens a lot and it’s making you feel like you can’t take any more.
You have also said that your mum hits you as soon as your father goes to work. I want you to know that it is not ok for anyone to hit you, that is physical abuse which is wrong and it is not your fault. You do not mention how you get along with your father and I’m wondering whether you might feel able to talk to your father about this. You can take a look at the physical abuse page in the Explore section for more information and advice about what to do if you are being physically abused.
It sounds like you feel you have so much college work to do that it’s impossible for you to help out at home. You could try asking for some support in college if you are struggling with your workload.
I can hear that you have been feeling like you want to run away. Running away could be very dangerous. I’m wondering whether there might be a family member or friend you could stay with to get a break from home. If you are thinking about running away, I would encourage you to try talking to a ChildLine counsellor first. They care about you and they can support you in finding ways to keep yourself safe. You can talk to them by calling free on 0800 1111. You could also register an account which allows you to send emails to counsellors or have 1-2-1 chats which is like instant messenger.
You mentioned in your letter that you hadn’t eaten since last night. I am concerned to hear this and I want you to know that it is very important to eat a healthy, balanced diet so that you have enough energy to get through the day. I’m not sure of the reason for you not eating but you could try talking this through with a ChildLine counsellor too. You might find it helpful to take a look at eating problems page in the Explore section for more information about different issues with food.
Take care,
Sam
Contact a counsellor online or call 0800 1111. Calls are free and confidential.